I was diagnosed with PPD after both of my pregnancies and I wanted to share both of my experiences.
I was told during my pregnancy with Liam that Postpartum Depression was common in my family. I took that time to research, ask questions, and take as much precaution as necessary. After Liam was born I had the common aches and pains a woman goes through after a vaginal birth, I fell in love with my husband all over again watching him become a father to our son, and I had an unconditional love for this incredible little boy.
It took three days after he was born and those feelings turned to extreme anxiety, overwhelming sadness, and no control over my emotions. I would cry for hours and have no reason for it. I would get panic attacks that consumed my whole body, It was as if i had swallowed hot coal and the white hot burning feeling would start from the pit of my stomach and grow up into my chest and head. My heart would be pounding and I knew that everything that I had read was happening to me. My husband and I decided to officially start bottle feeding Liam that day because of the stress I was under and the fact that he was 100% uninterested in breast feeding. The next morning I immediately made an appointment with my OBGYN. They were very supportive and happy I had realized the things I was feeling was out of my control and it was ok to ask for help. Right then they prescribed me with some medication. I only needed the lower dose to just help get my hormones back in check. The medicine took about 2 weeks to settle into my system. During that time I was taking Melatonin to make me sleepy to control my panic attacks. My mom would come over daily to help take care of Liam, make me meals, and take care of my apartment. I don’t know what I would of done without her! After about a month I started to feel myself and my husband had his wife back.
When I got pregnant with Bennett I knew there was a very good chance my Postpartum Depression would return. We decided from the beginning that I would bottle feed him as I was already busy with a toddler and didn’t need the added stress. I started taking the same medication and dosage I had the first time 3 hours after delivery. The three day mark came and my anxiety was about a 5/10. The next day it was 3/10. By day five I had no anxiety and I felt like me. The pains of pregnancy were gone, I had a healthy baby boy, and my family felt whole.
I wanted to share my story for those woman who might have felt the way I did the days after having a baby. Some times you might fell a little overwhelmed and completely exhausted, but if there’s a chance it might be more than that please don’t be embarrassed to talk to someone. Being a mom is the best gift God has given to woman, but we need to stick together and help each other out when we feel it’s a lot harder than we expected.
Us Mommies have to stick together!